There are times in our lives when we really feel abandoned, we feel as though The Good Lord is not hearing are prayers. Mostly because we are not getting the answers we think we should. When you're broken you feel as though everything and everyone has left you. You have those that reach out to you but all you can see is what's at the center of your brokenness. Nothing else matters.
If your broken now, know there is always hope. There will be a day when you are no longer broken. The sun will shine. Tomorrow will be a better day. Take it one moment at a time. Then one day at a time. This too shall pass! The Good Lord never leaves you, you just can't feel him thru the mudd that soaks your soul during this time. Stay in prayer and never lose hope! Time heals.
Excerpt from Chapter Five: The Floor and my Girl Sofie
Maybe I’ve missed God. Maybe I’ve missed our time we used to share and that special time alone on the outer window ledge where we’d meet when I was a child. Maybe I no longer have that little piece of Heaven in my heart. These past few months I know I have been consumed with the wedding. Had I forgotten to thank him?
Had I forgotten to thank the Good Lord for the love that I had found in Radley? Was this why it all fell apart? My prayers have consumed me in the past few days and they haven’t been of what I needed the most. I’ve somehow missed something in my prayers. I’ve somehow stepped off the path of healing and not been asking for the most important thing of all now. Peace. I’ve lost my peace.
I’ve been praying to be with the man that with every breath of his being had destroyed my heart, my soul, and my future. I had been praying for more of him, asking to have him in my life and pleading with God for me to be a part of his. I had been praying against my peace and not realizing it. Not realizing too, that he’d be the death of me; the death of my heart and center of my brokenness.
When you’re low in your life, you pray. You talk to God. You dictate to him what you think you need. You spend hours asking why. Why me, Lord? You don’t understand when you don’t get the answer you want to hear. You feel alone and abandoned. I was growing tired of praying but I didn’t like the feeling of abandonment. I felt God leaving me; leaving me alone to deal with my sadness. Truth is I didn’t want to be alone. I would have never chosen this. I wanted to be in love. That’s all I wanted. Now my Radley had abandoned me. My God had abandoned me. My peace was no more.
Olivia Gracey...Mother, Fiction Romance Writer, Realtor, Singer/Songwriter for Just Gracey, Photographer, Consider myself very blessed. I love a good workout and I love to dance in my socks!
"For just a mere time I felt safe, unbroken and loved. Just a mere moment in time I felt loved once again; Loved by the man who broke me."